How to Win Friends with Honey

This book.  Recommended to me when I first started my management role, when I started coaching, when I became a mentor, I finally sat down to read it.  It held my attention captive right to the end.

“You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” If you want to win people over, try being positive, respectful, polite and appreciative instead of negative, critical, rude and dismissive.  The book revolves around these principles and different techniques you can use to win people over.

The key methods to “making honey”, that stood out for me, are as follows:

1. Put peoples interests, passions, and desires ahead of yours.  The book has some fantastic examples of some of the great leaders of our time, and the influence they had over others, just by taking a sincere interest in who they were as people.
2. Appreciation and recognition are two principles that come up often throughout the book.  People love to be appreciated… it makes them feel important and valued, and people that feel important and valued are engaged and motivated to do great things.
3. Show that you are interested in people and learning about them.  Smile. Ask about their interests.  Remember their name.  Their favorite hobby.
4. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.  How often does criticizing or complaining to give you the results you want?  Probably not as often as you would like.  This is where the Golden Rule comes in: “Do unto others as you would have done unto you.”
5. Dramatize your ideas and align them with what people desire.  Find out what people value, what is important to them, what they see as their purpose.  Align your desires and passions with theirs and you significantly increase the energy and excitement for achieving results.

This book has many examples of how the principles have been used effectively, over and over in many different situations… families, friendships, business relationships, and even former presidents.   The principles were tested, and tested again, and continue to be true.  If you have a desire to influence others, or even just be a better friend, check this book out!